I am wondering when it will all end when People will not judge someone's physical appearance. Put all of your money together and begin to look at it as a whole. Quote: Originally Posted by Humboldt1. If the husband treats his wife as a princess and makes her feel like a princess, the wife will look after her body as she feels loved and special and the husband will have a fit wife. In that way, he is just belittling you and making you feel bad. With the new generation of singletons turning to online dating, apps and social media to find the one. As per that infamous scene in East is East when Om Puri is arranging a meeting with prospective brides for his sons? With the new generation of singletons turning to online dating, apps and social media to find the one. Currently working for a US MNC with a very good salary … They have bought into the programming that looks are only a minor issue in their dating life, one that “game” can easily overcome. "the less we had in common the more I detested him and found him even more unattractive.". As mentioned, finding someone physically attractiveisn’t the only reason for sexual interest. Is this more of a subconscious decision taken by those who are having an arranged marriage, or is this aspect even discussed? When you are well groomed your spouse notices you. The notion of respect cuts across both scientific and spiritual conceptions of marital intimacy. As this will often affect the way they interact with each other. We look at how age difference impacts love and arranged marriages and have provided a conclusive answers! If this were true, no less-than-attractive people would ever get married, and all older people would divorce once their looks faded. Not only does society judge dating outside our ages, but it also expects that we all age and develop at the same rate. Furthermore, it is expected that with age comes maturity, which isn't true. Toggle navigation . “The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. But you guys, marriage is a partnership. Looks do matter, though they should not be the only factor we are looking at when choosing who to date. When will the father stop being burdened his daughter? Does it matter? No just heart look is matter in marriage we should firstly understand our partners but  I always prefer love marriage bcz In love marriages individuals choose partners on their own while in case of arranged marriages partners are being chosen by the family  It is when an imperfect couple learns to enjoy their differences be it love marriage or an arranged one. Agape Love. Jacqueline Fernandez to make Ballet Debut? This is only slightly truer for men than for women — women are drawn to attractive men as much as men are drawn to attractive women. The officiant said, “Two become one.” Separating the money and splitting the bills is a bad idea that only leads to more money and relationship problems down the road. Her own parents suffered due to lack of attraction when their arranged marriage was set up: “My parents have been married unhappily for 22 years as my father has no attraction for my mother. Riz Ahmed reveals his ‘Secret’ Wedding Details, Jiah Khan BBC Documentary sparks Justice Campaign. We explore whether looks do matter in over personality or not. In case we do find content replicated in other parts of the platform, you can expect heavy downvoting and a mute.". So does marriage matter? Some feel in looks while others don't. There was a hope in her mother's eyes that they would like my daughter and there was a wave of happiness ran inside her because she was expecting that today no one would reject her.But when these women come out of the door and said to her mother that we don't like your daughter, her color is black,she Is overweight, his nose is crooked. Meena’s marriage ended in divorce. , your big girl is fat and because of this girls go away by answering ۔Black color is given by Allah. No just heart look is matter in marriage we should firstly understand our partners but I always prefer love marriage bcz In love marriages individuals choose partners on their own while in case of arranged marriages partners are being chosen by the family It is when an imperfect couple learns to enjoy their differences be it love marriage or an arranged one luckybiatch replied and said: It’s important and I do agree with the above gURLS, however when I first met my boyfriend, I wasn’t necessarily physically attracted to him. Doesn't it take longer than four years to realize you are married to someone whose face has now been consumed by their neck and whose nose is either much larger than was originally presented or has now started to sprout acres of nose hair? I want my life and my marriage to look less like the world and more like Christ. If you want to write a poem, you can do so in the dedicated POETRY community. 10 Best Free Calls Apps available on Android, Khushi Kapoor makes Her Instagram Profile Public, The Most Searched Indian Celebrities on Google in 2020, Varun Chaudhary weds Anushree Tongya in Luxury Indian Wedding, India Rocks Or Not? During the rishta process, it is often common for a boy and girl to rely on looks alone at their first meeting. Widowers and divorcees are often taken advantage of when looking at remarrying and going back home to find brides from India or Pakistan, which can lead to messy situations after marriage. Physical appearance in marriage has the power of attracting your spouse. Their approach to this matter is featured in a Growthtrac.com article, which was gleaned from their book, Does This Dress Make Me Look Fat? He had an arranged marriage in his 20s, which unfortunately ended in divorce after 10 years. The most likely times for cheating to occur are during the first year of marriage, following the birth of the first child, the seventh year of marriage (the infamous seven-year itch), and during middle age. Some have been lucky enough to have both. Traditional setups for a Desi arranged marriage are becoming increasingly less common. The shell changes but the inside essentially remains the same. You might think that scientists are above answering such questions, but you’d be wrong. Almost, certainly, the most common question asked when talking to someone online is ‘can you send me a picture?’ so, looks do make a difference. Sajal Aly shooting for Jemima Goldsmith’s film in London? What is the fault of these girls  , due to which they are being denied. So its been 2 years now that I have started looking myself for arrange marriage, talking with girls, parents through news paper matrimonial ads, matrimonial websites etc etc. Traditional setups for a Desi arranged marriage are becoming increasingly less common. Meena advises that her now ex-husband was, in fact, using the arranged marriage as a convenient way to enter the UK and gain a British passport, which was revealed at the time of divorce. If your spouse gained 30 pounds (lower metabolism, less active), started balding (husband) or hair started thinning (woman), their skin became more rough or oily and they got more blackheads, got premature wrinkles and looked 5 years older than they were, they started to dress frumpily and let themselves go clotheswise, would you still love them still and stay married to them or … What’s your sign? by Alchemy Black Country 2017, Indian Woman falls for Married Couple forming a Throuple, Indian Girl aged 19 murdered by Two Friends at Party, Pakistan buys Raj Kapoor and Dilip Kumar’s Houses for £235k, Amir Khan pictured with £113m Cyber Fraudster in Dubai. In our society this work is happening very much and girls are being rejected very much. By using Uptrennd, you agree to our Terms of Use, Privacy Policy, and Disclaimer Accept, We use cookies to enhance your experience. A Sense Of Humor. People are judging others based on profile pictures rather than personality. People with their individual preferences in choosing who to marry. And these words fell like lightning on her and the helpless mother watched her daughter go away with tears in her eyes who had probably gone to God to complain about her fate and her appearance and how can so be cruel and judge someone by appearance. I am 28 years old, finished engineering in India in electronics and telecommunications and Masters from US. There is the sense that because the marriage was arranged you must make it work, whether there is an attraction or not.”. Or is it openly obvious when there is no physical attraction that a lot of rishtas don’t take place? So looks might initially attract you but substance makes you stay. Others have not been so lucky. He\she is attracted to you. When asked directly, it seems that people don’t necessarily answer truthfully whether looks matter more than personality, for fear of making themselves appear shallow. Shallow as it sounds, the aspects of looks, even with an arranged marriage is much more of a factor than it used to be. When it comes to a Desi arranged marriage, most people know the drill. By using Uptrennd, you agree to our Terms of Use, Privacy Policy, and Disclaimer. If someone is looking for beauty first with personality not even a close second, then they might not be mature enough to get married in the first place. Oftentimes, these women are not interested in the physical appearance of their future spouse, so looks are almost irrelevant if it means a quick visa to the UK and a ‘better’ way of life. His experience post marriage and going online has been a different story. Like Segal, Piper explains that outward, physical attraction is fleeting, and therefore one should look to inward beauty in their spouse if seeking a long-lasting, God-filled marriage. She admits that looks really do matter to her: “If I’m not repulsed by them in any way I’ll meet up with them later and get a feel for our dynamic. No. The survey showed that it was in the first seven years of marriage that physical appearance really mattered but with passing years it gets influenced by other emotional factors like common interests, communication skills, etc, which help the relationship grow even if looks change. Sunny who in his 50s lost his wife, went on to remarry someone 15 years younger. They have completely lost the forest through the trees.. When you are presentable it has an indirect but very positive effect in your marriage. Nevada is a no-fault state. Many women face marital problems as they go out of shape after having children. But that's exactly what it is—an ingredient. Are Love and Sex before an Arranged Marriage Worth It? The first few years of marriage generally involve people whose faces have not yet turned into heated Silly Putty. She entered into the room with a Dish of Tea and having hijab on her head, and she was confident that no one could deny her today, but the women were enjoying the tea and staring again and again to her. Figure out what it looks like in your marriage today, and nurture it! Indrajit speaks of his own situation. Indian Boy aged 12 commits Suicide playing PUBG Game, Indian Girl kills Herself due to Affair with Two Boys, NHS Worker injected Herself & Daughter aged 2 with Drugs, Indian Lover dies after Wishing Girlfriend for 'Happy New Year', Hindi Medium film promises a Lesson of Relevance. 2. People say you’re in a good marriage if you never go to bed angry, if you always do everything together, if you let things go. But whilst the ‘rishta’ process has now evolved, do prospective families and couples actually consider looks when meeting their potential future husband or wife? Indeed, I think we should not blame anyone because these are old peoples who do this. DESIblitz is a ® registered trade mark | Email:info@desiblitz.com. But there is no getting around the fact that sexual interest starts with finding someone attractive physically. The taking of instant selfies or quick videos on almost every social media app and hitting send is so common that personality seems to be taking a back seat if there isn’t an instant attraction. In a relationship if love is stronger then looks then it wont matter at all. Rea has been in situations where she has gone to see a prospective boy arranged by family members. Having a good time and liking their personality speaks volumes in a potential match, even if they are only average looking.”. See what you think, as to whether you agree or not, as you read: A prospective husband or wife should be a genuine, born-again Christian who is growing and maturing in the faith and who is obedient to Christ. When will the helpless mothers stop begging for their daughters' relationship? All fairly stereotypical, but nobody seems to describe the physical attributes they are looking for. Most people will (or should) look beyond that when deciding to initia… Mani is a Business Studies Graduate. Yes, men are maybe more fortunate than women in that women value looks far less in a partner than men (Note: This does not mean women are less superficial than men, as they are superficial in different … ... You will look to AR Rehman while your husband swears the only music director worth listening to … Being attracted to someone sexually happens for a variety of reasons. Most, when asked, agree that it has to be a balance of both, but don’t admit that looks do matter a lot on first impressions. When you boost your post, it is added to the boosted post pool. Does Cheating Matter During a Divorce? It’s not only about the way they look. "For me, humor is super important in a relationship, I cannot stand a boring life," … The other most common answer that people gave us is that it has to be both personality and looks when it comes to an arranged marriage. I guess you could probably say that is why I am trying to focus more on the little moments in life and people in my life that truly matter. It’s as if the question itself is strange. Must Read Stories of Arranged Marriage and Divorce, Kim A. Wagner’s ‘Amritsar 1919’ to be Made into a Film, 10 Famous Gujarati Authors who Wrote Amazing Books, Deepika Padukone’s ‘authentic smile’ on show at Athens airport, Indian Restaurant found to have hired Illegal Workers after Raid, US Indian Man shoots Daughter & Mother-in-Law, Amazon Delivery Man on Horseback in India goes Viral, Man raped Woman aged 19 in Alleyway & infected her with STI, Faryal Makhdoom calls Amir Khan’s music taste ‘Gay’. Those women who take care of their physical appearance have a better rapport with their partner. Meena, on the other hand, had an arranged marriage quite young. They got on and have now been together 36 years, but not everybody gets this lucky. You are right that today's world pays attention to form and money but not to one's morals or goodness. Which kind of Domestic Abuse have you experienced most? Anyone who is married will tell you that, although looks might bring a couple together in the beginning, it is the kindness and care they show for each other that keeps them together until the end. It’s the selfless, unconditional type of love that helps people to forgive one another, to respect one another, and to serve one another, day in and day out. Which was the First Women’s Cricket Team to win Gold? Her motto is: ‘live for today what bothers you now won’t matter in a year’. So maybe the answer to ‘Do Looks Matter in an Arranged Marriage?’ is, yes they do matter, but it’s better to be coupled with a compatible personality. He says that looks did matter to him and it helped in making the decision to say yes: “We spoke for 20 minutes and we both decided to go ahead with the marriage through the vichola (matchmaker) and it helped that I was physically attracted to her.”. Does this mean you have to be good looking to attract your spouse? Couples who had a traditional Desi arranged marriage from the ’70s and ’80s where their families were the decision makers were asked the question ‘did you consider looks?’ didn’t seem to garner much of a real response. Adultery is not relevant and cannot be used against you. "Sorry, it is not possible to copy text from our platform, because we want to protect our authors from plagiarism. In a marriage, the partners need to take care of themselves physically to sustain their relationship. 2. The only solution is to always respect ourselves when we are faced with such challenges by acting normal and calm. There are countless message boards wherein at least one person attests that you’re in a good marriage if you never fight, or you always agree with each other no matter what. Speaking to Prakash, he didn’t quite understand and had never even considered it: “My father said he’d found my future wife, it wasn’t my place to question whether or not I was attracted to her as long as the families were compatible and happy.”. 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